Your First Silent Retreat – Q and A

1. What do you think are the most valuable benefits of attending a silent meditation retreat?

Silent retreats are unique because everyone is in it together and understands that you are not going to engage with them in the normal way, rather, you have turned your gaze within. This makes it a safe space without the distractions of your normal social interactions and allows you to become more aware of your habitual responses: you have permission to let them go and be still. In the stillness emotions may be felt more and memories that you normally bury may arise. You will have the time and support to nurture yourself, address and heal these past pains so your inner stillness can deepen and become more enduring.  You are likely to leave the retreat feeling more present, grounded and able to be your authentic self than when you arrived – in fact, perhaps, than you have ever done your whole life.

2. How do you help participants navigate challenges like restlessness or emotional discomfort during a retreat?

We meet as a group twice a day when general guidance about how to manage difficult emotions is shared. It is also a  time when people can, if they want to, share things they have experienced and struggles that they are having. They will receive teachings and healing meditations from the retreat guide – these are usually helpful for everyone within the group. In addition, there is a trained practitioner available 24/7 for individual support where this is needed.

3. What advice would you give to someone attending their first silent retreat?

Relax and enjoy the ride! You can look forward to an amazing experience where you can truly rest, free from the normal pressures of life and social interaction – there are so few opportunities to be truly still in our normal lives. You will usually find that being still with oneself is an amazing experience. ’Stuff’ will come up for you, but you will be fully supported and you will be given guidance on how to heal and release issues and wounds that you may may have been harbouring for years. And, weirdly, you will find you have developed a close bond with your fellow retreaters, you can feel less alone than you do in chatty environments! 

 

4. How can attendees prepare mentally and emotionally for their first retreat? What should they bring/pack?

Bring comfortable clothes and plenty of layers, it is important that you can feel cozy. Also bring outdoor gear for meditative walks. Bring a journal and pen. It can be helpful to have a large loose-leaf pad that is comfortable to write in, but also so you can choose which pages to keep and which to destroy because you want to be free of the issue you have written about! Also ear plugs, a dressing gown and slippers. You may want to bring a book by a spiritual guide to dip in to. Before attending I recommend reading ‘Loving What Is’ by Byron Katie or ‘A New Earth’ by Eckhart Tolle. My advice is to deliberately NOT do what you would normally do! So, for instance, if you are prone to get lost in a book – don’t bring one! You will be asked to turn off your phone and tell your family that you wont be available except in an emergency (a number for them to call in any emergencies will be supplied).

5. What does a typical schedule look like at a silent meditation retreat?

We meet on Thursday early evening and eat together before gathering to share what we want to get out of the retreat and you will have an opportunity to raise any concerns and have these addressed. We go into silence at bedtime and remain in silence for the following day. We normally have yoga at 8 and then breakfast. We meet together from 10-11.30  for ’Satsang’ when you can receive teachings and meditations and then spend time turned within all day, including at the evening meal. There is an evening meeting at 8.30pm. You can help yourself to lunch, snacks and drinks when you want them and there will be an optional group walk in the afternoon. You can arrange an individual session with a practitioner if you want one. On day 3 we break the silence before dinner and share our experiences in the evening. Departure is at 10 on day 4 – but some of us will be staying behind for a walk and pub lunch. 

  

6. What are the most common challenges first-time attendees face at silent meditation retreats? How do you recommend they overcome them?

It is common to feel really uncomfortable to not interact with others, even at meal times, if it is your first silent retreat. Please see this as an opportunity to explore your habitual behaviours with curiosity and love and know that just for now you have permission to just be! You may get fidgetty or bored and miss your usual pass-times. You will be taught exercises that allow you to become increasingly relaxed, at peace and happy with your own company. Should something become too difficult you can reach out to the support team at any time. Other less urgent challenges can be brought to Satsang and your experiences will almost certainly be familiar to others in the group! It is helpful to see every challenge as a learning opportunity and an invitation to explore and heal another layer of di-sease. Having said all that, silent retreats are mostly joyous events and are an absolute privilege to attend and serve at!!